Quantum Sleeper For Paranoid A-holes

My theme today is "weird enclosures," and so far it's a success. I've found electronic womb eggs, a solar powered teepee with WiFi, two queen beds, solar-powered DVD player and more, and now this.

The Quantum Sleeper. Where crazy people and vampires lay their heads to rest.

As much as the Ovei pod failed to inspire claustrophobia, the Quantum Sleeper makes up for it: designed to protect sleepers from "Bio-Chemical terrorist attacks," stalkers, kidnappers and natural disasters, the Quantum Sleeper has "creepy rich guy" written all over it.

Let's examine the creepy features. Rebreather and filtered ventilation. Control panel, of course. One-way see through head cover (weird) and proximity/motion/smoke/oxygen sensor. Emergency CB and short-wave radio (are you getting the picture yet?). An audio amplifier so you can hear anyone whispering or creeping about, should their government technology jam the motion sensor. An external override key and emergency release. And, of course, for truly creepy effect: a toiletry system.

For just a few shekels more you can also get a TV, PC, DVD player, microwave or refrigerator.

Quantum Sleeper, a Safe Night's Sleep With Space For a Tin Foil Hat [Uber Review]