Verizon CEO Ivan Seidenberg Explains The Mysteries Of Time, Unleashes Silly Hate

"Mommy, what happens when time passes?"

"Why son, people get older."

I didn't believe my mother or her fancy ideas up until Verizon CEO Ivan Seidenberg spelled it out for me in language I can understand: techie Apple-humping language. In an interview with Financial Times, Seidenberg relayed his "ho-hum" attitude towards Apple and Steve Jobs himself by saying that, eventually, Jobs will "get old."

Before you say, "He could've meant Apple and its popularity will get old!" I'll say, "Look at that again. Did he say Apple will get old? The iPhone will get old? No. He said Steve Jobs the person will get old. Yes, we get old and die."

Stupid, stupid, stupid. While I agree with Seidenberg's assessment that the iPhone will not, in fact, dominate all cellular phones ever, I also think he's posturing, trying to sound like a big man with lots of curly browns on his chest. He also says something about a conspiracy but frankly, I'd lost interest by that point.

As a side note, Seidenberg makes $21,309,264 a year.

[MacUser and Financial Times via Media Bistro]