PetTech: DogPause Healthy Dog Bowl For Your Best Friend Or SM Slave

First off, let me just say: Hank, the dog in the video, is a freakin' slowpoke. 1:02 to wolf down a bowl of puppy chow? My baby could make that kibble disappear in half that time.

Secondly, I can't count the number of times I've heard my mother ask if there wasn't some way we could slow down the dog's dinner so that the dog might enjoy it more. Then follows the same old speech wherein I tell my mother to stop anthropomorphizing my angel and leave well enough alone because I'm an adult now, thank you very much.

But after watching the DogPause bowl in action (I think they just divided it up into quarters so the dog can't plant his or her face in the bowl), I can't help but wonder: am I a terrible father?

We gays pamper our beloved pooches, sometimes a little too much, and god knows we love to have things just right. So maybe getting compulsive about chewing time isn't a bad thing - just don't tell my mother.