World Cries As Apple HQ Burns Like Gomorrah

What? Was that a little too sensationalist? OK, yeah, maybe, but you'd think that was the case given the press this story has garnished.

A part of Apple's Cupertino compound caught on fire last night. Thankfully, no one was injured. That should kind of be it. But look at the coverage Gizmodo provided:

A fire broke out in Apple's Cupertino headquarters last night, starting on the roof of a two-story building, and severely damaging it. Initial reports suggest that the three-alarm fire at Valley Green 6 started at or near an air conditioning unit, and was phoned in by workers on site. About 66 firefighters were on scene ultimately—they put the fire out in approximately half an hour. Currently there's no details about what Apple uses the particular building for, so the repercussions are unclear. But luckily it looks like no one was hurt. (emphasis mine)

Gee, I'm glad to see that no one was hurt, way at the end of the article. I'm guessing it's more important whether or not the specs on the new MacBooks were lost than any human lives…

Well, as Reverend Phelps and his crack job "church" would say, this is obviously God punishing Apple for their support of homosexuals. Obviously. So, the lesson here is if you don't want Apple to burn, my gay brethren, you need to stop buying Apple. Or do like Focus on the Family did and pray for rain.